My Personal Miracle

After several years of research, prayer, and investigation, I am convinced beyond any reasonable doubt that the foundational claims of the Mormon Church are unquestionably false. It was heartbreaking to discover this because I was a hard core true believing Mormon, but I was not going to waiver on something of such importance where my salvation is concerned.

In the beginning I was sure the claims of the Mormon Church would stand up and I looked forward to the adventure of proving the Mormon Church true. OOPS!  I discovered otherwise.  I went through great emotional trauma, many sleepless nights, and great frustration as I discovered the real truth about the Mormon Church.  When I told some of my Mormon friends about some of the real truth I discovered, I was met with comments like, “I don’t want to hear it”, “it must be a lie”, “I’m not going to worry about it”, and “Don’t worry about those things that don’t matter”.   I was also told that I was in the grip of Satan and that I was going to hell.  I was even “commanded” in the name of God to get on my knees and ask God for forgiveness.  I was told that I was an apostate.  I was told that I could not discern between truth and error.  I was told that it was me who had a problem and not the Mormon Church.  Some were telling my wife to divorce me.  Others called me a “Laman” (a bad character in the Book of Mormon who hated God and who loved to sin and was proud and wicked).  I was also told that I lost my faith and testimony of the gospel of Jesus Christ and that I just made up my mind that the Mormon “prophets” are liars.  Others were also told this about me.

Not once did any of my Mormon friends say to me, “Wow, I did not know that.  Thanks for informing me.”  “Thanks for telling me.  I need to look into that.”  “Did that really happen?  Why doesn’t the Church tell us these things?”  “Why did you leave the Mormon Church?”  As my so-called Mormon friends said the sort of things they said to me, they did not care or even think of the emotional trauma I was going through.

I want to state for the record that it is not me who had the problem, but it is the Mormon Church which has the problem and is still a problem for untold thousands!!  I also want to state for the record that I did not lose my faith in Jesus Christ and in his Gospel.  I have a strong faith and testimony of Jesus Christ and in his saving grace, which is recorded in the Bible.  I believe in Jesus Christ more strongly than ever.

Next, I did not simply decide that the Mormon prophets are liars.  I DISCOVERED that they are liars and deceivers.  I lost my trust and confidence in that organization known as the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints for a couple of reasons.  First, its top leaders--the 15 men in the black suits, past and present--are liars and deceivers, which can be proven.  Second, its teachings constantly change through time, which can be proven.  The contradictions in this organization of its past and present are too great to be ignored, especially its past and present contradictory teachings that are tied to the idea of salvation, which can be proven.

I am a believer in miracles. During my extreme and painful transition out of Mormonism, I almost threw away any notion of God, Jesus, and religion because I was always taught that the Mormon Church was the only true church and kingdom of God on this earth and that all others were false.  Since I had the idea that all other religions were false, I almost threw it all away until a thought popped into my head.  It said, “the idea that all others were false is a Mormon teaching.”  As I pondered that thought, I said, “YES IT IS!,” so I rejected it immediately and grabbed hold of Jesus Christ and threw myself mentally at his feet and cried for mercy and grace.  Mercy and grace I receive in abundance!

Previous to these events, during my two year Mormon Mission in Australia from 1980 to 1982, I read the New Testament several times, especially the Book of Romans.  I went through this book trying to understand the concept of grace that the Apostle Paul taught using my Mormon eyes.  But understanding what Paul taught was impossible, because it contradicted what I thought was the correct concept of grace as taught by the Mormons.  It was like trying to fit a square peg into a round hole.  Years later when the Lord Jesus Christ opened my blind eyes and as I read the Book of Romans for the first time, I understood the true teaching of grace, and oh how sweet it was!  The liberation I felt as the yoke of Mormonism was lifted off of me!  The square peg that I once had did become round and it did fit into the round hole with the correct understanding of grace.  I was like the man that was born blind who gained his sight through the grace of Christ.  I say this because I was truly born blind; I was born a Mormon and for 50 years I was blind until through the grace of Jesus Christ my eyes were opened and now I see!!  The awful part about being born blind into Mormonism is that you do not know that you are blind. 

It was during this painful transition that the Lord in his wisdom put Mr. Cristino David into my path.  I have known him for many years at La Joya High School.  At the end of the school day, some years ago, I walked into his classroom and noticed a website he was looking at.  It was a Christian website that he was reading.  I confided in him and he helped me through my transition from Mormonism into Christianity.  During the next year and a half he tried to get me to go to his church.  I was very reluctant, because this change I went through upset my wife.  I went to a few his Bible study meetings he had on Friday nights.  I was starving for fellowship.  Fellowship with my Mormon Friends ceased, because fellowship only existed with them on their terms.

It was during this time another miracle was performed on my behalf.  Most teachers were shifted to other rooms.  I was moved to a room in C hall, but that was changed and I ended up next door to Sylvia De Leon.  She was also moved to that room next to me.  During this time I shared a lot of things with her about Mormonism.   She shared with me her story of departure from the Jehovah Witnesses.  During the time my wife was calming down, Sylvia invited me to her church, Abundant Grace Community Church.   There I met her sister Anna and brother-in-law, Frank Luna.  They are a great support to me.

As I said earlier, I am a believer in miracles.  It truly was a miracle that my eyes were opened, because I was an extreme hard-core believer in Mormonism.  I will always be eternally grateful to the Lord Jesus Christ for his grace and mercy on me, for putting Cristino David and his family and Sylvia De Leon and her family into my path, for easing my pain out of Mormonism, and for helping me to walk the path of true Christianity.  I finally have come to grips with the understanding that True Christianity is not so much a religion, but a relationship with Jesus Christ--our Lord, our Savior, our Redeemer, and our God.

As to my Mormon family and Mormon friends, I would like to say as a prayer on their behalf so their eyes can be opened, using the words of the Apostle Paul, “My heart's desire and prayer to God for (them) is, that they might be saved.   For I bear them record that they have a zeal of God, but not according to knowledge.  For they being ignorant of God's righteousness, and going about to establish their own righteousness, have not submitted themselves unto the righteousness of God.   For Christ is the end of the law for righteousness to every one that believeth” (Romans 10:1-4).

Robert Billings
[email protected]

June 2013
Updated January 2018

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